If you are still using pathetic-looking jalapeños like these, do yourself a favor and pitch them or at least give them to someone you don’t like. Do not donate them to Harvesters – poor people have dignity too. Instead spend two bucks and 15 minutes to pickle your own delicious crunchy jalapeños. The recipe I am using is in Russian and translated version reads like gibberish, so with the credit to original creator of this recipe I will translate it and use my own pictures.
1. Buy 10-20 nice-looking jalapeños. I usually pick the mixed colored ones, they just look good.
2. Slice thinly the jalapeños, some shallots or onions and 5 cloves of garlic.
3. In the meantime heat up two cups of white vinegar (5%) with 2 tablespoons of salt, two tablespoons of sugar, less than a teaspoon of oregano ( I don’t put too much at all) and few bay leaves. When sugar and salt dissolve turn the heat off and let cool.
4. Place your jalapeños, onions and garlic in a container.
5. Pour cooled liquid over the peppers.
6. Cover the container and place in the refrigerator for 24 hours until vinegary smell dissipates. Because the seeds were left in, these peppers may only get hotter with time.
Disclaimer:This recipe was safely tested on my co-workers. I cannot be held responsible for the damage to your internal organs.
Warning: During the preparation of this recipe resist the urge to rub your eyes and any other sensitive parts of your body. Wash your hands before touching yourself. Women and girly-men are allowed to wear gloves.
Everyone knows that the 1st generation immigrants are the great keepers of the American Traditions. From the time they get their copy of “How to become an American” handbook when they cross the border, they start religiously celebrating all of the American holidays from singing auld lang syne on the New Years Eve to consuming mass quantities of turkey and stuffing on the Thanksgiving day. It’s the immigrants who have real citizenship certificates signed and sealed by a federal judge and not a baby footprint. It’s the immigrants who can pass a 100 question civics test to become a citizen. It’s the immigrants who know that the second stanza of the National Anthem is not just humming. It’s the immigrants who can correct spelling errors for their American co-workers.
This explains why a flawless reenactment of the First Thanksgiving was performed at my house today; I might have thrown a piece of pork in the smoker, but otherwise – flawless.
When I was growing up® beauty salon employees were not dressing up as nurses any longer, although this seems to be a fancy establishment in 1956 Moscow.
With the current events affecting the American car industry these photos showing (in my opinion) the best-looking American cars ever made are even more bittersweet.
If you are still using pathetic-looking jalapeños like these, do yourself a favor and pitch them or at least give them to someone you don’t like. Do not donate them to Harvesters – poor people have dignity too. Instead spend two bucks and 15 minutes to pickle your own delicious crunchy jalapeños. The recipe I am using is in Russian and translated version reads like gibberish, so with the credit to original creator of this recipe I will translate it and use my own pictures.
