Recently I watched a blogger video review of the AMC Fork &Screen that was so exuberant that in the end I was expecting the author to kneel down and have a “sexy time” with the person who gave him a free ticket. In the end he announced that AMC knows how to handle the “social media” (obviously by giving away free tickets to bloggers and twitterers). Since I am not a member of any media, here is my “Top Ten Reasons I Don’t Like Fork & Screen” unadulterated by freebies and special treatment:
- You don’t have a choice of seating if your movie is shown only in the Fork &Screen section.
- You are FORCED to buy $5 worth of food.
- Hardly anything on the overpriced menu is under $5.
- The lights never go off, which you wouldn’t normally tolerate.
- Because the lights are always on, you can’t make out with your date, unless you want to become the center of attention.
- You cannot lift the armrest to get closer to your date.
- Servers walk around during the movie, which would be frowned upon in the normal theater.
- You can hear leather seats squeak and other people eat.
- Tables obstruct the view of the bottom of the screen (where subtitles may be shown) unless you are over 6 feet tall or sit straight up at all times.
- Higher d-bag -to- normal person ratio than in regular seating areas.
In the future, on the rare occasions I am actually going to the movie theater I will avoid Fork & Screen which is neither about a “fork” nor a “screen”. It combines marginal movie-watching experience with mediocre overpriced food.
You, however, may like the place if you
- use words such as “ambiance” and “atmosphere” in reference to restaurants and other venues.
- prefer Whole Foods, Target and Starbucks to Walmart, Walmart and …Walmart.
- wear a beret to a French movie and refer to the movie as “cinema”.