Five Guys Burgers and Fries – decent food priced right. Small cheeseburger (which is actually normal size) and a  ton of fries is more than enough for a hefty lunch. Free all-you-can-eat peanuts and fries are made in peanut oil. Stay away if you have allergies, otherwise not bad for the money.

Burrito Bros.- Burrito can be split in two for a light(er) lunch, only half of a burrito is photographed below. I wish they had an option similar to Chipotle’s burrito bowl. Very nice reasonably priced locally-owned lunch spot.

Reviews courtesy of a human junk food disposer.

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This post is brought to you by the Johnson County Central Resource Library’s new awesome microfilm reader.
Also brought to you by the library’s outstanding raise-deserving personnel.

On January 20, 1981, at the moment Reagan completed his 20-minute inaugural address after being sworn in as President, 52 American hostages were released by Iran into U.S. custody, having spent 444 days in captivity.

The Iran Hostage Crisis was well-covered in the media, with reports and dispatches published and broadcast on a daily basis during the 444 day ordeal, but in the last few days before the Algiers Accords were brokered, the hostage news were back on the front pages of every newspaper.
*all the images should be readable, if you care to do so just click to enlarge.

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We only had one full day in Minneapolis so we had to make it count. Getting around the Twin Cities is easy, even considering horribly confusing twin I35 highways. On any highway you will probably find yourself to be the fastest driver in the city – the rest of the population competes in out-slowing each other and driving under the speed limit without actually coming to a complete stop.

From the beautiful downtown Minneapolis…

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A little worm asks his father:
-Daddy, why do some worms get to live in apples and oranges and we live in a pile of shit?
-Because it’s our Motherland, son…
Old Soviet Joke

When I was boarding a plane to Los Angeles last Wednesday I knew all about my destination.
It was full of aging hippies…

…who wear Birkenstocks year round…

…overrun with crime (I am pretty proud of this shot right in front of the Grauman’s Chinese Theatre)…

…chronic diseases…

…about to be washed out by a tsunami…

…infested with illegal tax preparers…

…where fat people are discriminated against while being taunted with snacks…

…and skinny people are being put on a pedestal.

But somewhere during my five days in LA, my American dream got kicked in the groin. For years I was arguing with my friends on both coasts that I live in a better place, full of parking and almost devoid of traffic, safe and with good schools, reasonable and affordable, while still having a chance to see recent Broadway shows and dine at ethnic restaurants. After every trip I returned home complaining about the crowding, overpriced real estate and horrible traffic everywhere I went, feeling good about the rush hour slowdown on the highway we refer to as “traffic” and my relatively minuscule mortgage payment.

LA made me realize how badly I was mistaken. My friends were right, I live in a Podunk town, in a boring provincial backwater where the foodies are taking turns revisiting the same 10 restaurants and 3 markets; where the same 6 women (and probably men) are at the top of all dating sites (albeit under different handles); where finding a date with at least two degrees of separation from your previous one is almost impossible; where any chain restaurant opening is an event worthy of TV news coverage and traffic congestion; where the only bragging rights are “at least we are not Tulsa or Omaha”. Indeed we are not.

At the same time there are wonderful magical places where it’s almost always warm and sunny but you can look up in the mountains and see the snow; where at any given time more women are dressed in heels and bikinis than the whole statistical female population of the KC Metro Area; where the people are always in a sunny mood and free of depression or PMS and are happily smiling even while being arrested; where the 52-week donut project would take 52 years and still will not be able to eat a donut at every one of them; where the restaurants from all over the world are open even in the areas that are not scary without bars on the windows; where the oranges and lemons grow in people’s backyards instead of the allergy-inducing trees that are planted here for some mystical reasons; where the produce is not an imitation food sold here; where fat people are magically drawn outside to ride bikes or walk or run so even their over-consumption of donuts or cakes from a Cuban bakery around the corner is not detrimental to their health; where driving up and down the mountain roads makes one feel like James Bond; where you “can take a nothing day and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile”.

So I told my daughter to pick a college in California, the only place where my American dream can make another run for it.

Maybe I can take a ride on the “Possibility bus”…

…or just mount my Focus on top of a school bus…

…I can trow down my magical money blanket on the sand…

…or pour my lifetime savings into a yacht…

…just so I can see this…

…or this…

…and this…

…and I will wait as long as I have to.

httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4J0HD_82hw

P.S. I don’t need to know why it’s so great to live here and why it sucks in California. Trust me – I know. And learn about hyperbole.

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The state of Missouri takes its “show-me state” nickname literally, and there is no shortage of places where certain things are shown to the citizens and guests of the state.

Billboards for the adult mega-centers and superstores break the monotony of an average I-70 cross-state drive.

The righteous citizens counteract the best they can. The following billboard is the Holy Grail of billboards. I frequently post on the subject of billboards here, but I don’t think I can ever top this one. To photograph this rare find I took a detour and put myself in danger parking on the side of the highway.
What makes this billboard so unique is that until today I always read it as “Jesus saves and forgives pornography”, not having enough time to read the last line driving by at highway speeds. Apparently that’s not the case and that’s a pity, because Jesus would probably double the amount of followers if he did.
There is no better place to educate people about abortion then the side of the highway. That’s where many people do most of their reading.


As an unintended side-effect of my billboard hunting I discovered a creative way to deal with the native omnipresent Missouri front-yard pile of rusted metal. This resident of Concordia, MO can give KCMO artist Stretch some pointers on how to run a welder.








Other flying objects were hidden in the building.




Lastly, consider this your visit to Jonesburg, MO.









The “pride in their heritage” museum is open on Sundays 2 to 4.

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