• Who Are The Ad Wizards Who Came Up With This One?!

    This blog is so well-known in certain marketing circles that I almost feel obligated to bring up a subject which may be of interest to them. Today I will showcase talent, fresh approach and marketing savvy of creative geniuses who brought you this innovation:

    ♥Fine Print On Billboards♥

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    Lets say you are driving North on I-35 around 127th street overpass and you notice this enticing billboard. “GasoLean“, just what you always wanted, but something is not right and no amount of squinting allows you to see just how “GasoLean” this vehicle is. Is it closer to “GasoBulemic” when it actually throws up most of the gas it consumes, or is it bordering on “GasObese”?
    It’s simple. All you have to do is drive up to 127th street, park your car at the nearby apartment complex, walk up on the bridge and read the fine print.

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    Still can’t see? You must be getting old, have a closer look. That’s all, just a quick drive and a short walk away.

    Who are the ad wizards who came up with this one?!

    Next: Why I dropped my subscription to the Consumer Reports Magazine.

  • Billboards: Two States – Two Realities.

    When I was growing up©, we had those “us and them” propaganda posters like this:

    Two Worlds - Two Plans

    At the top, a Soviet  manager points to a map of windbreaks and hands his worker a sack of acorns to plant under the heading “We are planting life!“. At the bottom, a capitalist directs a general to a map of the military bases under the heading “They are planting death!“.

    Recently I noticed several billboards on the opposite sides of the State Line with the similar “compare and contrast” message.

    On the Kansas side we should be thanking the legislators for our “safer roads & 1000s of new jobs for Kansans”:

    Kansas legislators make construction workers happy; the guy in the middle and his shovel are ready to build even more roads for the grateful Kansans.

    But on the Missouri side the same guy is not smiling, he can’t even lift the shovel because of those fund-delaying evil legislators the gullible Missourians voted into the office. He even tucked his shirt in, that’s how sad he is.

    That’s why there is nothing but the pothole-ridden rough road ahead for the Missourians and the unsuspecting visitors to the state.

    Obviously, it’s not fun to be a construction worker in Missouri, no reason to smile for sure. Maybe just for the photos for billboards on the Kansas side.

    *photographing billboards is not easy and it was raining today, hence the quality.

  • Rising Sun Over St.Louis

    A little historical aside before I get to the subject.
    If you ever drive on I-70 past the sign “Historic Downtown Rocheport” don’t waste your time getting off the highway. Here is a 1-second tour of the place.

    Now get back on the road, you still have a couple of hours to go.

    St.Louis Japanese Festival is one of the better-organized, meaningful and entertaining festivals in the country. I visited it once before and enjoyed it so much that I didn’t have any reservations about going there again.
    The Japanese Festival is once-a-year occasion when otherwise shy Americans release their inner Japanese, normally hidden deep inside, wrap themselves in shower curtains and prance around in uncomfortable wooden flip-flops pretending to like weird-looking food.

    My favorite Japanese traditional entertainer Masaji Terasawa was there once again making spun sugar sculptures, origami figures and making fun of the public.

    I have few clips of his performance.

    The Sumo demonstration was probably the highlight of the day since we decided not to stick around for karaoke.

    On the way back I was tempted to get some “Free water in the name of Jesus” but decided against it, just in case it turns into wine and causes me to get a DUI. I wasn’t so sure I could count on Jesus to pay the ticket.

  • Nothing Still Rhymes With Minneapolis

    We only had one full day in Minneapolis so we had to make it count. Getting around the Twin Cities is easy, even considering horribly confusing twin I35 highways. On any highway you will probably find yourself to be the fastest driver in the city – the rest of the population competes in out-slowing each other and driving under the speed limit without actually coming to a complete stop.

    From the beautiful downtown Minneapolis…

    Continue reading →

  • Religious Billboards of Missouri: The End Is Near

    You might have noticed more activity than usual on this here blog and it’s not because I am less lazy, but because the time is running out and I have less than a month to say everything I’ve ever wanted to say.

    This fine specimen of the religious billboard art is located around Truman Rd. and HWY 71. Notice a Bible Seal of Approval at the top left and a person in the position painfully familiar to anyone who ever used a squat toilet at the bottom right.

    In any case, I suggest you repent soon, use up your vacation and deplete your savings accounts.

    You have been warned.